I really dislike for being such a coward. I feel to have some courage in me to do something I wanted and have my own destiny in own hand. Somehow, things are unpredictable and uncontrollable sometimes. I am not trying to blame someone BUT I would always thinks that faith must have fool me around to like someone I shouldn't have.
I didn't mean it when I can't even control the feelings in depth of me. I didn't notice it until I was with him. I didn't even know he can be so influencing till I have him in my dream almost every single night when I go off to bed. I am really giving up.
I am not going to repeat what I have done because I did not see any future in us. I did not see any chances in us. I did not even see the possibility in us. I just wish I can step forward but there's no path for me to reach and I shall only remain where I am. I don't want history to repeat once again where I'm rejected and hurt deeply because I can't stand with rejection anymore in this condition. I might seem to be selfish but this is how I can protect myself.
I am letting of something that does not belongs to me. Wrongly said. He never even own by me before. I wish nothing but the best for you! Adios, love!~